Dec 10 2007
Tears
The soon to be demolished railway station of Rotterdam is temporarily renamed from “CENTRAAL STATION”. The current shuffle of neon sign letters means “shedding a tear” in Dutch.
I’m sitting here in Nijmegen, the Netherlands, next to my mother. She’s trying to fight off another pneumonia. Yesterday she indicated that she didn’t want to be transported from the nursing home to a hospital. They are administering morphine in increasingly higher doses. She doesn’t talk anymore, just sleeps while breathing heavily. I hope she has nice dreams.
No, I didn’t go to the Netherlands for an emergency visit. This visit was planned a long time ago and I saw her two days ago, when she was still lively and alert. Things go fast sometimes. Coincidence? I don’t know.
Monday, 10 December, 2007 @ 16:01
Het is vast niet zomaar. Het voelt alsof het heel goed klopt bij wat ik voor beeld heb gekregen van jou en je moeder. Voor wat het waard is uit enkele duizenden lettertjes, natuurlijk. Nogmaals sterkte.
Monday, 10 December, 2007 @ 19:43
I imagine that she is dreaming, and, underneath, that she can feel that you are there. Bon courage.